Prayer for the Sick

This has been on my mind a lot lately.  So many people in my circle or near my circle have been struck with severe illness in the last couple years.  It's very sobering.  It's actually hard for me to really take in.  I have to fight against passivity because the thought of the actual burden is quite overwhelming.

Well, one of these families was in church on Sunday and had an opportunity to share with the body what their year has looked like, and also testify to God's sovereignty.  It was quite moving, heart-wrenching, and inspiring at the same time.  Afterwards, our pastor stood and said a prayer over our body...a prayer filled with Scripture, filled with humility, filled with petition, and filled with praise.  His prayer really stuck with me.  Before the end of the day, I asked him to email it to me (because I knew he had it written down).  I've meditated on it these last couple days and I want to share it with you.  If you know someone, or know of someone, who is struggling with illness but you don't know what to pray (or what to keep praying), I offer this to you as a place to start.  God's Word is living and active (Heb 4:12)...and in It there is power!

Our Most Gracious Heavenly Father, we humbly bow before you this day and say with the Psalmist:

We bless You, O our souls,
And all that is within us, bless Your holy name.
We bless You, O our souls,

And forget none of Your benefits;
Who pardon all our iniquities,

Who heal all our diseases;
Who redeem our lives from the pit,

Who crown us with lovingkindness and compassion;
Who satisfy our years with good things,

So that our youth is renewed like the eagle.

(Adapted from Psalm 103:1-5)

Indeed, Lord, we rejoice knowing You alone truly heal the brokenhearted and bind up their wounds (Psalm 147:3). We can proclaim with confidence these things are true:

For You formed our inward parts;

You wove us in our mothers' wombs.
We will give thanks to You, for we are

fearfully and wonderfully made;

Wonderful are Your works,

And our soul knows it very well.
Our frame was not hidden from You,

When we were made in secret,

And skillfully wrought in the depths of the earth;
Your eyes have seen our

unformed substance;

And in Your book were all written

The days that were ordained for us,

When as yet there was not one of them.

(Adapted from Psalm 139:13-16)

And yet, Father, we groan during our pilgrimage on this earth, infected by the curse of sin and subject to sickness and pain as a result of the fall. We groan, yes, because we suffer and at times are tempted to lose heart. We ache and hurt and become downcast in our souls. We groan mostly, though, because we long for the ultimate hope we have through Jesus Christ our Saviour Who has risen from the dead conquering sin and death...a hope that will be fulfilled on that great day when we will see Him face-to-face.  While we wait, our frailty reminds us of both of our weakness this day and the reality that we will be frail no more on that day. We recall these words of the Apostle Paul and exult:

It is sown a perishable body,
it is raised an imperishable body;
it is sown in dishonor,
it is raised in glory;
it is sown in weakness,
it is raised in power; 
it is sown a natural body,
it is raised a spiritual body....
For this perishable must put on the imperishable,

and this mortal must put on immortality.

(1 Corinthians 15:42-44, 53)

And so, Father, we come before Your throne today with complete confidence in You.  You are sovereign, You are ultimately and completely trustworthy, and You are worthy of all glory and praise. We long, then, that You be glorified in the midst of the sickness afflicting many in this body. We also express a great desire, Lord, that this prayer - offered in faith - will restore those who are sick. We would be grateful if the way You choose to do that would be to heal their bodies. We know You are able to do this, either in miraculous ways without earthly intervention or by working through human means.  We submit, though, to Your ultimate purposes that are always designed to result in both our good and Your glory. We consider that word - restore - and it brings to mind Your perfect care for us as our Shepherd both now and forever:

The LORD is my shepherd,
I shall not want.

He makes me lie down in green pastures;
He leads me beside quiet waters.

He restores my soul;

He guides me in the paths of righteousness
for His name's sake.

Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,

I fear no evil,
for You are with me;

Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.

You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies;

You have anointed my head with oil;

My cup overflows.

Surely goodness and lovingkindness
will follow me all the days of my life,

And I will dwell in the house of the LORD forever.

(Psalm 23:1-6)

May all who are sick rest in these great truths...truths that remind us our health, our healing, our hope, indeed our very identity, are hidden safely in You, O great God. And may these great truths be a sweet balm to the souls of the sick as they press in ever closer to You, remembering this:

Therefore we do not lose heart,
but though our outer man is decaying,
yet our inner man is being renewed day by day.
For momentary, light affliction
is producing for us an eternal weight of glory
far beyond all comparison,
while we look not at the things which are seen,
but at the things which are not seen;
for the things which are seen are temporal,
but the things which are not seen are eternal.

(2 Corinthians 4:16-18)

We ask all these things of You, Heavenly Father, THE LORD GOD, THE ALMIGHTY, WHO WAS AND WHO IS AND WHO IS TO COME, in the name of Jesus Christ, our great King and Saviour, Amen.

Grandparents

...Grandparents.  Today was Grandparent's Day at our children's school, Regent Preparatory.  It is such a special day.  One of my favorite of the whole year.  The children start preparing right after school starts...memorizing songs, poems, Scripture, famous speeches...preparing art and science projects.  It is  HUGE day for the school.  They put on a fantastic presentation with a blend of historical, Biblical & patriotic components, and every year I either tear up or at least get a thump in my throat.  And it is all to honor...Grandparents.  Grandparents are such a rich part of a family's history and children can learn so much from them...especially unending Love!  Not every child gets the chance to grow up with grandparents, so I am thankful for every blessed year that they are in our lives...loving on us, cheering us on, interested in our lives, and always there when you call or want to drop by.

My boys are blessed to have 3 grandparents and 2 great-grandparents.  And all 5 of them come to Grandparents Day every fall...one of whom drives 2 hours to do so.  I am so thankful for the grandparents in our family because they just love us and our children with a deep richness that is palpable.  Their arms are always opened wide and their giving is unending.

We can never equally give back to you to the degree you have invested in our family over these past 60+ years, but our school and our families honor you today to show you what a rich heritage you have helped create with these young children.  The life lessons you have taught us, we pass to them.  You have a great legacy behind you.  Our boys may not recognize it now, but one day when they are sitting in the audience with silver hair watching their own legacy on the stage, they will remember...and be grateful.

Thoughts

Well....stuff is on my mind all the time but I don't seem to make time to get it here on the blog.  I think that's because I envision myself as having this really great blog that everyone loves to read...so I don't want to post something that doesn't live up to that standard, in my mind.  Hence, I already have 2 blog posts that have been started but never even finished.  So, I have to lower the expectation I am putting on myself.  Short blog bursts, things I am thinking about, questions in my head...nothing long.  Something I can do in 10 minutes.

Our church has been meeting the last 8 Wednesday nights doing a series on the Body...the Body of Christ that is.  Last night I was challenged on taking my thoughts captive.  Something I have done a lot better with over the years.  I found myself thinking about how much I have improved in this area...how much more awareness I have in this regard.   Then.....the next morning......I got behind a slow driver.  I heard myself thinking, "Give me a break!"  This reminded me that even though we improve in an area, even greatly improve, we still fall short of God's perfect design - elimintaing any opportunity for boasting.  Thank you Jesus for reminding me Who is the Source of all growth and Who is the Carrier of all my short-comings.  I don't deserve you.

Annointed

Believe it or not, this is the first time I've had a block of time to myself with nothing pressing to do so I can finally blog!  Life has been a whirlwind since school started, it seems.  Throughout August & September, I would occasionally think of a cool blog title for something I was doing...but alas I have not gotten around to making it a reality.  The stuff that's on my mind will eventually make it down on this virtual paper though...at some point.  So, what do I write about first?  What event(s) stick out in my mind first when I think back on the last 6-8 weeks.  One definitely comes to mind that I've been wanting to blog about.

It's actually a followup on a previous post of mine about a rental house I bought.  It was a cool story of how Jesus blessed me richly when I was trying to get a good deal on a rental property that I wanted to refurbish.  Well, this is the conclusion of that story.

After we closed on the house, which was about a 3-4 weeks later, we immediately started the rehab.  And by we, I mean my contractor.  However, I was there at the house every day...sometimes twice a day making decisions, answering questions, solving problems, delivering supplies, writing checks, you name it.  Whew!  I was in a hurry though to get it finished, cleaned and listed for rent because the end of August was really close and a lot of people like to move at the end of the month.  I really wanted to get it listed in time for someone who might have needed it September 1st.  One month of missed rent is a big deal on the bottom line too.

Okay...so we bang this house out in 1 week.  And that is 6 straight days of 6am-10pm hours with the last day ending at 2am because carpet was being delivered.  Side note: they usually don't work those kinds of crazy hours, and despite what it may sound like...I'm not a slave-driver.  However, they had a tight schedule and so did I, so there you go.  After carpet is laid and a final cleaning, it's ready for rent.  How close are we to the end of the month?  Ack!  Too close.  About 2-3 days left.  Oh well.  Let's see what happens.

Now comes the exhausting part...if managing a rehab is not exhausting.  Getting called all day long from potential renters, who you are trying to interview as candidates without letting them know that's what you're doing.  Scheduling showings in between working, school pickup, other appointments, evening & school commitments...spending enough time with each renter to get a feel for them...managing the insecurity of "Did I price this too high?  How does my house compare to others?"  After 1-2 weeks of constant showings with no bites, I start to wonder.  What should I do?  Stick to my guns?  Lower the price?  I had it priced on the high end because our rehab guy did an absolutely fantastic job.  It looked better than I imagined it would, so I thought I might be able to get a higher rent.  First week of September is down now, with nothing.  So I lower the price.  My thinking is that if people want it by October 1st, they should be biting with an application soon.  I don't want to squander good potentials because I have it priced too high.  I am sharing my thoughts with my good friend who also has rental properties.  I told her it was making me a bit nervous, waiting on God to provide the right family for that house, but I knew the wait was good for me.

A couple days later, she calls and wants to pray with me about the house.  What a blessing she is!  I say sure, and she goes on to explain that the last house she bought she anointed with oil and prayed over it.  Hmmm....I have never done that before.  I mean, I have prayed over every house either while I was in it or while I was thinking about it...praying for the people who would live there.  But I've never anointed anything.  I'm not opposed to it, I've just not done it.  It there something specific you're supposed to say?  Is it the same as praying?  I know what it means...Set Apart for God's Purpose...and that's what I want this house to be.  I want it to serve Him well and bring glory to him by the way I use it and by the people who live there.  So, I invite her over to the house and it's just her and me.  She has a bottle of oil from her house, and all she did was dot a bit on the door and window frames while she prayed for the house, it's protection, for the people, etc.  Similar to what I was already doing prayer-wise, but with the biblical significance of adding the oil & asking God to set this house apart for His purpose.

It was such a joy praying with her.  She didn't have to do that for me...but boy did it bless me.  So, now there is oil on the door posts.  Everyone who walks in and out of that place is walking underneath prayer.  That is a cool picture. 

Next morning.  Phone rings.  Again.  Another renter wants to see the house, but they are on a tight schedule and want to see it right now...if I'm available of course.  Well normally I am not because I have myself pretty booked up, but I actually had that whole morning free and was just cleaning house and doing laundry.  So, I said okay and met them there.  So, now the interviewing starts.  Why are you moving?  What do you do?  Where are you from?  Let me show you around.  But I don't make it sound bulleted like that.  Just like a normal conversation.  After all of that, I learn that they are believers and are very faithful to a local church.  She has been a Christian for years...and he has been one for 3 weeks.  Come again?  3 Weeks?  Turns out, she has been praying for him to recognize who God is and His power to save, and through all his ups and downs and a big emotional low, his eyes were opened to what his life was missing. Jesus!

So cool!  It wasn't just their story that moved me, but also just the way they were.  They were different than others I had seen.  Oh, and the kicker....their lease expires in 4 days.  They need the house immediately!  Whoa.  How did God do that?  Well, the rest is history.  We signed the lease the next day and they started moving in that night.  Now, when I imagine them at that house, living with their kids, doing life, I imagine that oil that has not been washed off...that they are walking under (unknowingly) every time they enter a room.  Those prayers now live there, just like they do.  Thank you Jesus for that gift to them that they don't even know about.

Don't Wait for the Funeral

Last night I hosted a Lia Sophia (jewelry) party at my house...this is big for me because I'm not a huge fan of hosting parties like this, especially if they involve too much cooking...but I digress.  Anyway, the rep who was selling the jewelry started out in the usual way..."Will everyone introduce yourselves to the group and tell us how you know Julie."  Okay, sounds easy enough.  But then....she made one more request.  "And please tell us 1 thing that you admire about Julie."  Uhhhh, I wasn't expecting that.  I made a little joke about how I promise I didn't put her up to that...and then I looked to see who was the first person in the circle. 

Side note:  I hate being the first person in the circle when asked to do something like that because you get No warning and Not enough time to think of something really good.  Especially if it's a hard question like "tell us something funny about this person" or "tell us something no one else may know."  Okay, really?  That takes a little time...and sometimes a Lot of time to come up with something....and then you're on the spot looking stupid if you have to think.  Then the anxiety from the silence makes it hard to think....and round and round you go.

Okay...back to the circle.  Will this be awkward?  Who is first...whew!  It's my mother...and next to her is my grandmother (who was so dear to come support my party even though she doesn't wear jewelry!).  So, my potential awkwardness subsides.  Surely my mother won't have to think too long about what she admires about me.  And she didn't.  But I didn't expect the answer I got.  "I admire Julie for getting this house so clean because I was here yesterday and it was a Pit!"  *gasp*  "Mother!"  Definitely got a laugh though.  So much for family secrets, I guess.  To be fair, she was being serious in that I had worked all day and still managed to get the house ready for company, which would have been hard for her, hence...something she admired.  I love you Mom....thanks for keeping it real! 

Then on to Grandma who said something sweet about the first time she saw me, and the circle continued.  Now onto friends.  Hopefully the laughing at my mother's comment and the Awww's I got during my grandmother's turn gave the other people enough time to think of something!  Then things turned surprisingly sweet & sincere.  I heard things about how organized I was, how well I raise my children, about my good financial & business sense, my diligence to working out, my overall friendliness, and my relationship with Jesus.  Woah.  I didn't expect how this made me feel.  Quite the center of attention, which isn't the most comfortable place for me to sit....and a little overwhelmed by all the sweet words, which I knew were genuine.  I made a quick joke about how I felt like I was at my funeral or something!  That got some laughs, then we were off to some fun jewelry shopping for the rest of the evening.

However, I can't stop thinking about it.  We usually do wait until someone's funeral to say all kinds of nice things about them.  Why is that?  Maybe the opportunity doesn't often present itself.  Maybe it's not quite comfortable.  Maybe it's that we don't often take the time to think of something to say.  Maybe we think that person already knows how we feel.  It does take more effort...more effort than just enjoying their company or participating in a dialog.  It's a little out of our box...just enough out of our box to keep us from doing it much.  "I love you" is different than something you admire.  That takes a special effort.  And we are willing and eager to go through that effort after we have lost someone we love, because it helps us grieve them.  But when you think about it, isn't that kind of self-centered?  We are eager to bless someone when we need it, but are a little oblivious when they need it.

I remember a couple years ago when someone from our small group at church suddenly died.  She struggled a lot with her self-esteem...but when I listened to what sweet things everyone was saying about her (me included) I was a bit sad that we didn't say those things to her when she was here.  Maybe she would have thought differently about herself if we were (I was) more diligent to tell her those things when she was alive.  Well, after being on the receiving end of all those blessings and realizing what a big difference it can make to someone's outlook, I plan to change that.  I'm glad I didn't have to wait until my funeral for those words to be expressed about me.  They bless me so much more now than they will then...obviously!  So, my goal?....to enrich other lives around me not just by showing them I love them, but telling them why I love them.  Maybe it will change someone...you never know.

Recovering Control Addict

My mind is an interesting place to be...I think.  Not interesting in the sense that I think I am super interesting...but interesting in that I think on things that probably no one ever thinks about. 

I regularly refer to myself as a Recovering Control Addict.  It's not a label I'm proud of, and it has caused its share of problems in my life.  I see myself as "in Recovery".  I'm not sure what "chip" number I'd be on if they actually had a support group for such people but I might be around the 5-year mark.  I guess that's how long I've been "sober" from the grip of having to control my environment.  David and I laugh about it now.  There is an upside to this condition...at least it feels that way to me (I guess you'll have to ask those around me to get the real truth on that one).  My nature is to see the details of everything.  I manage details well.  I can see details that need to be addressed before they come up...if I'm organizing something, I can plan it out in my head so that I can spot the holes.  David on the other hand is the big picture guy.  Many times I have gotten overwhelmed in the details of something and can't see the forest for the trees...and then he saves the day by showing me what seems so obvious to him.  David to the rescue!  Then I can get back to the business of getting the details worked out. 

So back to my addiction, if I see a better way of doing something...I want to say something.  If there's a faster way to get somewhere or a more efficient way of accomplishing any task...I want to tell you!  Don't you want to know how you can do that thing better than you are?  Hmmmm...you see my problem?  Okay, so I feel like I've earned my sobriety chip because now I don't always tell you what I'm thinking.  Isn't that nice of me?....right.  Didn't I say there was an upside?  Oh yeah...the upside is that I do tend to be super-efficient in most tasks I set out to accomplish and I can snuff out the inefficiencies really fast...and I can see several steps ahead and plan for it.  These are handy traits in the workplace and when planning 2-week family road trips (have you followed my trips on facebook...those take 3 months to plan!), as well as being helpful in other areas.  On the other side, I have really learned to let go...let go of my need to have you do something the way I would...let go of how it may affect me if we get somewhere 15 minutes later...let go when I see inefficiencies that are really not a big deal.  On a side note, one thing that really makes me feel loved is when David asks me, "Which direction do you think would be the fastest?" or "What do you think is the best order for us to run these errands?"  Really?!?  You want me to tell you what I think?  I'd be happy to!  One time I asked him why he wanted my feedback and he said, "Because the way you do things is usually pretty good!"  Melted my heart....

Okay, so lately as I've been driving in my car...things cross my mind...about driving.  Actual driving.  I think about all the things I have learned about driving that you can't get in driver's ed.  All the things you learn through experience...like when you are driving in 3 lanes of traffic and you want to merge into the center lane, you have to look in the far lane as well to make sure no one else is wanting to merge into the same spot.  See, I told you my mind was an interesting place to be!  Well...maybe that's not the word you would use.  Okay, so my oldest son is 10...which means in 5 years he will be in the driver's seat while I am slamming the imaginary brake in the passenger seat.  I am already trying to prepare for those days so that I don't revert into old habits.  But I can already see that it's going to be tough because the consequenses of bad driving are not just getting somewhere 15 minutes late. 

So, to satisfy my need to control that environment (and by that I mean pass along my well-earned wisdom on the subject) while still maintaining a let-it-go attitude...I have a plan.  I plan to casually share my wisdom in very small pieces over the next few years...while he is still young enough to think I actually know something!  Just like when you explain smoking to an 8 year old...you say "That is bad for you" and you say it in varying ways over the years so that hopefully when they are old enough to choose for themselves, you have imprinted your wisdom into their mind enough that it sticks!  I already see that with my boys and driving!  Here are some comments I have already heard from the backseat:  "Look mom, that guy on the motorcycle is not wearing a helmet!"  "Mom, they have their dog in the back of that truck.  That's dangerous!"  "Look mom, that lady is texting on her phone!"  I just smile when I hear these comments, because it means my plan is working!  Wisdom being successfully transferred from mother to son!  I have to hurry up though...10 is not far away from the yucky years when I all of a sudden have no idea what I'm talking about.

So , that's what's going on in my head lately...at least while I'm driving.  How can I possibly teach all I know about driving to my kids so they will be fantastic and safe drivers? (Usually I'm thinking this while some teenager almost causes a wreck in front of me).  Okay, I'm realistic enough to know that will not happen...but I'm controlling enough to give it a shot.  There's got to be a balance...right?

Whisper #3 - It Once Was Lost, But Now It's Found

This is my 3rd post on Jesus whispers that I experienced this week.  What is a Jesus whisper?  It's something I made up...at least I made up the name.  See my my previous 2 posts for the history.  In short, they are stories of very specific events I experienced this week where I knew without any doubt that Jesus was intimately involved in giving me a helping hand.  How do I know it was Jesus and not just "good fortune?"  Well, I guess you can ask the same question of someone married to an identical twin.  "How do you know which one is your spouse?"  Uhhh...while they may look the same to others, I guarantee you their spouse can tell the difference...because they Know them.  Really know them.  While my "knowing Jesus" is always growing, I know Him enough to tell the difference.  So, I am giving Him the credit for these specific circumstances where I knew "something more" was going on here.

My last 2 posts were regarding some pretty big events and decisions I had to make this week.  This one however is pretty small...but I Love it when I see Jesus loving me in the smallest of ways.  Ways that others would never see or recognize or even think is a big deal.  Now, there are a million little good things that happen to me all around...and I honestly don't "thank Jesus" for each of them when they happen.  I just take it, enjoy it, and move on.  But there are some special times...times that may look the same to others...but where I can tell that this is different.  It's like Jesus went out of His way to give me something...or at least that's how it feels.  That's the case here.

Okay, let me set the scene.  Next to my side of the bed is this really small round table (it's actually a plant stool) big enough for an alarm clock and a bottle of lotion.  Near that table is a small trash can and a laundry basket with dirty laundry.  One day, I am looking for a certain piece of clothing...like a swim suit or something...and I was digging around in the dirty laundry to see if it was in there.  So I had kind of emptied the laundry out onto the floor while looking...then scooped it all up and put it back in.  That night as I'm heading to bed, I notice that there is 1 earring sitting on my small round table.  Where did this come from?  I don't remember this being here.  So I ask David...do you know where this came from?  He said he found my earrings on the floor so he picked them up and put them on my table.  Hmmm...okay.  But where is the other one?  Did it fall off again?  Where did it go?  I quickly look in the trash can, which is full and right next to the table.  I try not to move too many things around in it, in case the earring is precariously sitting on top of something.  I don't see it.  I remember the laundry.  I hope it's not in there!

Ah!  Irritating.  I love these earrings.  They are what I call my England Earrings.  David bought them for me in England...not the one overseas, but the one in Epcot!  They are still from England though so it counts!  Okay, so now I get to look through my entire trash can before I empty it...sounds like fun...but the fun will wait until tomorrow.

Tomorrow comes and I need to do laundry.  I start to pull out dirty clothes, and I see that full trash can.  Irritated.  Where is that thing?  I am careful to pick up the laundry one piece at a time in case the earring got "scooped up" into the basket.  If the earring is in the clothes, hopefully it will fall out if I'm careful.  Nothing.  No earring.  Okay...I move on.  I'll get around to sifting through that trash can at some point.  Laundry goes into the washer and my day goes on.

Later that day, I remember that I have a load in the washer and I start putting them into the dryer.  About half way through unloading it, I wonder to myself if the earring actually was in the clothes and got washed.  Okay...it happens all the time where the kids have coins the their pockets and I get some free money at the bottom of my washer (I actually have a bank above my washer to keep lost coins...and it's very Full).  Usually as I get closer to the bottom of unloading the load, I hear clanging noises from the coins being scooted as the laundry shifts (since I have a front-load washer).  So now I am hoping to hear some metalic noise as I get to the end of the wet clothes.  Then, at that Exact Moment...I hear the whisper.  Look in the lip of the washer.  (My front-load washer has this little lip near the rubber seal where a sock will occasionally get lodged).  Huh?  The lip?  You practically have to stick your whole head in the washer to see into the lip.  I haven't even finished unloading the wet clothes...but out of curiosity, while on my knees, I stick my Head in the washer, half-full with wet clothes...and There It is!!!  I can't believe it!  I pick it up...and just sit there with this huge smile on my face.  Immediately I think (and I may have even mouthed it), "Jesus, you are so nice to me!  You are just so nice!"

I run into the bedroom where David is and show him.  He was happy I found it but I don't think he really understood what had just happened.  I felt like Jesus had just scooped down and given me a little side-hug and said "Here you go."  I just loved Him so much for that.  What a nice thing for Him to do for me!

Now, when I wear them I will not only remember my sweet husband and when he bought them for me...but I will also remember this story...knowing that whatever joy I received from it, He had more than that when doing it.  And I love Him for that!

Whisper #2 - To Buy or Not to Buy? That is the Question.

Okay, here we go.  Whisper #2.  This is a continuation of my series of 3 Jesus Whisper posts.  See previous post for the back story.

Some of you know this, but many may not.  David and I started buying rental properties this year.  We have a goal to build up a portfolio of good properties, fix them up nice, and rent them into the foreseeable future.  Housing prices are depressed, so it's a good time to buy and hold.  The goal is to accelerate our loan payments with the rent received so by the time we are 50, we have rent-able assets with no mortgage.  Stable source of independent income. 

My name is Julie....and I'm a Planner.  Coming up with "a plan" is something I love to do...and seeing the plan being realized is So Fun!  Especially a Financial Plan!!  Between Julie the Accountant and David the Finance major (did you know David was a Finance major?)...we love to solve money issues.  Sit down at the kitchen table, run the numbers, look at the spread of options, decide what our real goal is, weigh the risks, and figure out how to mitigate those risks and make it work.  We even High-Five each other when we reach the solution!  Hey...doesn't everyone High-Five and Hug during financial planning?  Well...that's how we roll.

Side note:  We have gotten several comments about "How can you afford that?"  "Where are you getting the money to do that?"  No worries.  David and I are not reckless and we make smart choices.  A lot of houses are selling below market value right now, for one reason or another...a lot below.  Find one with great potential.  Snatch it up, fix it up...and now it's worth market, but your investment is a lot lower than that.  Get a loan based on market value.  Rinse and Repeat.  It's not complicated, but it is a numbers game.  The numbers have to work or it's not a good deal.

Okay...so back to this week.  I get a call from my agent, "There's a house I think you should see."  I check out this house and immediately there are things I like about it, but it is also in pretty bad shape.  I start to get quiet...I'm thinking.  Walking around the house...and thinking.  How much will the rehab cost?  What could I rent it for?  Do I like that area?  What would I be willing to pay for it?  There's a bunch of unknowns in a house like that.  Got to factor those in.  I head home...think some more.  Calculator comes out.  I decide to low-ball it and see if they even respond.  Maybe we can get a dialog going.  Let's see what they do.  House is already listed below market, but not enough below I don't think.  At least not enough for my model to work.  Tuesday afternoon, I submit an offer...a really low one...20% less than asking price.

Wednesday mid morning, I get a counter.  A dud counter.  They came down $1,000.  Okay, what this means to me is that they think it's worth what they're offering (and it probably is - to someone else), and they don't plan to budge, but they are still willing to discuss it with me.  My agent thinks it's worth the price...and I agree, but just because the house it "worth" a price doesn't mean it will fit "my plan."  The plan that we High-Fived over at the kitchen table.  Got to stick with the plan.  Do the numbers work?

All day Wednesday, I am thinking.  Processing.  Calculating.  What's the high & low rehab figure?  What will it appraise for after rehab?  What's the high & low rent range?  I decide to drive through the neighborhood again.  I like it.  I like the house.  Time for a serious offer, but what should it be?  I'm sitting on the couch with my Iphone calculator and mortgage calculator...being still...thinking...and waiting for the whisper.  Waiting for the nudge to help me decide.  What is the most I'm willing to pay?  Honestly, I'm not sure.  I'm kind of black & white.  In this instance, I'd like to have a number where I could confidently rest and say "This is the highest I can go within my plan.  If I can't get it at that number, then that's fine."  For some reason, I couldn't rest on a figure.  Too many unknowns I guess.

In the stillness of my space, late Wednesday afternoon.  I start to hear the whisper.  The Jesus whisper.  An internal suggestion of sorts.  He suggested a number.  It was a number I was sure they would reject and was lower than the number I was thinking about countering.  But it was a number significantly higher than my first offer.  Hmmm.  That number would definitely give me more room for a "fudge factor," it's definitely higher than my original offer which communicates that I'm serious.  Okay, I follow The Whisper and text my agent the counter offer late Wednesday.  In the meantime, I am trying to still decide where my high figure will be. If they come down at all, how high am I willing to go?

I think about it a few times on Thursday, but really give myself a break and just wait to see what they counter.  Thursday is busy and I'm working at the office.  No text from my agent.  I run some errands and get a text at 4:00.  I get excited for a second when I see that it's my agent...but all she says is that she hasn't heard anything.  The house is bank-owned, so the response may not be quick...but it was quick the first time.  That's strange.  (This is the dialog in my head).  I'm eating dinner with David (kids are with grandma) and telling him about the house...what it looks like, what I like about it, the status of things, etc.  During dinner, I get a call from my agent.  She is excited.  They accepted your offer!!!  They accepted your offer!!!  *Gasp*   I immediately thought about Jesus and imagined Him whispering into the ears of those bankers over there...This is a good offer.  You must accept this offer.  Kind of like Obi Wan...These are not the droids you are looking for *insert hand wave here*.  Ha!  Did I mention we are a Star Wars loving family?

Thank you Jesus for your sweet whispers to me that guide me and show me where to go in the darkness.  I love you and need you as my greatest Companion, Father & Friend.

Stay tuned for 1 more Jesus whisper this week....can it get better?  Yes it can!

Whisper #1 - Service with a Smile

This has been an interesting week.  A bit has changed in my life since Monday...and I love it when that happens because it makes life interesting.  I also always learn something with each rock of life that I uncover.  There were 3 distinct times this week where I needed some guidance...I needed to make a decision or needed help with something.  When I come to that place where, now I have to make a decision...what should I do here?...That's when I get still.  I think.  I need a quiet place, or at least a quiet place inside my head.  After processing the options I have, I almost always ask David his thoughts, after explaining what I've considered.  He listens, hears the pros/cons I've come up with and usually adds thoughts and considerations that come to mind to help me.  Then...I sloooow down, think through, imagine myself in each option...and I wait.  I wait for the whisper.  Do you know what I mean by whisper?  For me, it is quite distinct.  It feels different than an idea, it sounds different than my voice to myself.  I talk to myself a lot in my head, and I know what I sound like to myself...if that makes any sense.  The whisper is God's voice.  Not a voice that you hear, and not just a feeling, but it's almost like...while I am thinking and processing, a thought Pops into my head out of the blue and not in the normal course of my own thinking.  It feels like I'm searching a dark room for something and all of a sudden a small light blinks to the side...just to get my attention.  That's what it feels like to me when I'm trying to decide something and I get an urge about it that is unrelated to the logic I am walking myself through.  Now usually they complement each other, but usually the logic stops at some point and you have to decide something base on what you have.  God's whisper is very distinct to me...so distinct that I immediately give Him credit for the outcome in those circumstances because I don't feel like I got there on my own wisdom, but like I was led.  Of course wisdom is given by God and I make a zillion decisions based on that wisdom every day...but some are different where I feel led to the decision by Someone Else.

All that was a lead-in to 3 whisper moments Jesus gave me this week...and I love Him for that.  Well, I'd love Him anyway but it just makes our relationship so much closer when He does that for me.  Lately, I have been re-examining where I serve.  Church, school. community.  Way back when the kids were tiny, I started serving everywhere.  I needed the outlet, being a full time stay at home mom (SAHM).  It grew from serving on a committee at church for a women's event to the following:  Attending a bible study, teaching a children's bible study, teaching in VBS, running a whole section of VBS, co-chairing the women's event, chairing the women's event, leading a small group at church, class mom for my pre-schooler, and serving in the school library.  After 3-4 years of that, I was wiped and I took a huge break from it all.  I back out of everything.  I decided to serve in 1 place.  That's it.  I will teach Sunday School with David...because I love to teach.  Don't ask me to do anything else.  I turned down lots of requests to teach other places, serve on committees.  I even stopped attending my Bible study because I wasn't in the right place to receive it.  It was just another thing on my list that I started to resent.  Sloooooowww dooooown......

Okay, so now I've been slow for a few years and it felt great.  So this is the weird thing.  Just a few weeks ago I started feeling like I should re-examine where I serve.  I kind of felt like there was more for me to do right now, but I wasn't about to jump on something.  I just had this sense like I should so something extra.  Like what?  I kind of just sat in that space for a few weeks.  No rush.  Just being still about it.

Then I get a call.  It's a call I have gotten before...in fact I got one last spring.  I saw the Caller ID and I knew exactly who it was.  The only reason this person calls is to ask me to consider serving somewhere.  For just a second, I considered letting it roll to voicemail because I just had heard from her last spring and I had to say no.  I made an honest consideration at the time but felt very strongly that it was a No right then.  But I felt the "urge" and I took the call...very willing to hear what she needed me to consider but fully expecting to have no change in my answer.  At the beginning of the call, I felt pretty sure that it was still a No.  But by the middle of the call something changed.  Not because of anything she said because it's the same request I've had before...but it was a soft whisper, an urging.  After the call, I immediately told David how weird I felt.  Very different from the other times she has called with the exact same request and I knew it was a no.  I started imagining myself in the No position, and anxiety stated forming.  I imagined myself in the Yes positon and sweet recollections of years past came to my mind...things God taught me through this service, ways I changed during those years, the leaps that I grew, and the lives I touched in that place.  "I think I'm supposed to do this" I told David.  And his demeanor was different too.  Previously he would tell me outright, I don't think you should do that.  This time was different. 

The next day I called her back and said Yes...and I even told her my journey to get there.  She gave the glory where it was due as did I.  So I am officially teaching Bible Study to children for the next school year at BSF.  Bible Study Fellowship.  It's a fantastic organization not affiliated with any church, with classes all over the nation and the world.  There are 3 women's classes in the Tulsa area and they have changed my life.  Teaching children is one of my favorite things to do and being a Children's Leader in BSF is a huge commitment but I'm going to let go and see what God does with it.

Stay tuned for 2 more Jesus whispers I experienced this week....

Manna from Heaven

I actually forget that cantaloupe is one of my favorite fruits, or maybe my Very favorite, until it is in season and you find them everywhere.  Then I remember.  Cantaloupe!  Must. Have. Some.  David and I went to Whole Foods one evening, which was a treat because we are never on that side of town, and we went there to get one thing, Brazil nuts.  Let's face it, how many times do you go to the grocery store to get just one thing and actually walk out with only one thing?  OK, that was the case here.  We walk through the produce...my favorite part of Whole Foods by the way...and I gaze at all the beautiful and fresh fruit.  And there is was.  Caught me off guard.  I gasped...maybe squealed a little bit.  Locally Grown & Organic, Oklahoma Cantaloupe!!  I didn't know they grew those here!  I am totally having one!  The first one I picked up smelled so good (on the spot where the vine attached) and it was heavy for its size.  Hey...I've been listening to those Food Network shows.  The next morning, I cut that baby open.  It was so juicy on my cutting board.  My hands were sticky and wet when I was finished.  I put it in a bowl and savored each juicy bite.  It was like having a small glass of water with each piece.  So delicious!  I took a picture on my Iphone of by bowl o'Loupe and texted it to David.  I was then quickly reprimanded for "premature cantaloupe consumption!"  I really could have eaten that whole thing while sitting in front of some TV show...but then where would my marriage be?  Hmmmm, guess I'll save some for hubby too!  That night as David and I finished it off...that cold, juicy, sweet, ripe,organic piece of heaven...it got me thinking.  Cantaloupe is a super-food, according to Dr. Oz at least, meaning it is Jam Packed with healthy stuff, super-concentrated in one fruit.  And where did this food come from?  It's not anything that man made.  It came from a seed.  A seed.  A seed that sprouted in its own mysterious way and grew into a flowering vine that bloomed these huge balls.  Balls of deliciousness, with the fruit safely protected inside.  Not just any fruit...but fruit that strengthens and protects the human body, protects it from cancer cells, nourishes it with vitamins, strengthens it with energy!  As I'm eating this fruit, I'm imagining God populating the earth with these balls o'deliciousness...because He loves us.  What a weird fruit, grown in a weird way, given like Manna from Heaven.  We didn't design it, we can't create it.  He came up with it, and he sprouts it out of the ground right on time, every year, just for us.  And it just "so happens" to have so much of what the body needs to be at optimum health.  Thank you Jesus for showing me your love and care for me through a cantaloupe!

I am FULL!

"I am full"...or alternatively "I'm not very full" or "I'm empty" are the words David and I use to describe how much attention our love language needs.  What is a love language?  It's only one of the most important things you need to know about your spouse in order to maintain a healthy and fantastic marriage...in my opinion.  In short, it is the one thing someone could do for you that would communicate Love to you in the highest way.  There are 5 love languages and everyone has at least one.  Mine is Quality Time. Those closest to me know that I neeeeeeed quality time with you in order to feel connected and engaged...loved.  The circle of people from whom I need this is actually quite small.  And I don't need it all the time or anything...unless you're David and then yes...and I don't need it from everyone (thank goodness!) but for my verrrrry closest friendships, Quality Time with me at some level along the continuum of our relationship is what communicates "I love you" "I value you" "You're important to me." 

Now, quality-time-people tend to come across as high-maintenance friends.  Why?  Because you have to spend tiiiiime with them...and not just Any time but Quality time!  Quality time to me is talking about how you are doing, how you feel about things going on in your life, things you're struggling with, things you are learning about yourself, and vice-versa...all that DEEP stuff.  Heavy right?  Yes, it is heavy but so rewarding.  Because it is so heavy, a little goes a long way.  I only need that level of dialog every few weeks to keep my love language topped off at full, or every few months for a good maintenance.  With David, it's less than that.  When he hears me say "So, how are things going at work?" that is my entrance into some Quality discussion time with my very best friend of all time!  Thankfully, my closest friends also have a high quality time need, David included.  That's his #2 love language.  So we all kind of fill each other up!

Okay, so that brings me to this week.  Today is Friday.  I can not remember a richer week for me in the Love department than this week.  And none of it was some over-the-top expression like you hear about...a husband surprising his wife with a huge gift or a trip somewhere.  No, nothing like that.  Time...just time.  That's what it was.  It started Tuesday morning when I took the kids to a friend's house (one of my friends in that small circle) to swim in the neighborhood pool.  After a couple hours of that, we ended up spending the whole entire afternoon hanging out on her couch while the kids played upstairs.  We talked about all kinds of stuff...I can't even remember what...but I remember how it made me feel! 

Wednesday evening I went to a different friend's house to spend some good girl time and ended up staying until almost midnight.  I love learning new things about my friends...things about their character, hang ups they have, their perspective on situations...and that's what this was.  I left feeling like I knew her sooo much better, and that I couldn't wait to do it again. 

Thursday was a day I have been waiting on for months.  My best friend since childhood (and by childhood, I mean 3rd grade!) came in town.  She lives on the east coast so I get to see her about once a year when she comes home to visit family.  This time she came without kids or husband...that has never happened!  So I carved out an entire day of my week to spend it just with her.  We met for breakfast at 8:30 and went from there.  We hung out until 6:00 when she finally forced herself to leave because she had standing dinner plans with family.  We talked about everything from marriage to TV shows.  She told me all kinds of things about her life and friendships she has back east.  I told her about my closest friends here and new things in my life.  We reminisced about days long ago.  Things we wished we'd done differently.  Things we got right!  Ahhh.  So refreshing.  What a treat.

In the middle of this on Thursday, my mother-in-law who is keeping my boys calls and asks if they can spend the night.  Why, yes they can!  So after my east-coast friend leaves, I text my husband the good news.  No kids tonight!  So we head to dinner at an old Mexican restaurant where we used to eat when we were dating.  We talked about finances and plans and checked our Iphones for movie times.  We ran a couple errands together and saw a feel-good movie.  Can things get better than this?

Yes they can.  Turns out my swimming-pool friend is having my boys spend the night at her place tonight (Friday) so that means #2 night with no kids.  OMGoodness!  So much Quality Time squished into one week and spread across so many friends, I think I might just explode with how loved I feel.  When I said I can't remember a richer week in the Love department, that is an understatement!  My virtual arms are extending virtual hugs to you all right now.  I feel the love, and I love you too!

I am so FULL!

I guess I'm a blogger now!

Well, here it is.  My first blog post EVER!  I never thought I would do this.  In fact, just the idea of blogging used to make me tired.  I think that is because of the type of person I am.  I don't want to sound dumb or boring (hello!  I'm an accountant!) and creativity has always seemed to be out of my reach a bit.  I like things to be stable and the same, generally speaking, aaaaand I have a lazy streak.  Why think when you can veg?  Okay.  So why am I blogging?  I've found that I love reading other people's blogs.  Not random blogs of people I don't know, because honestly that seems like a waste of my time...sorry to those of you who do that.  :)  I read the blogs of all my close friends & family who have them.  I have customized my Google page (iGoogle) to show all the blogs I follow, plus news, etc and reading the blogs is the first thing I want to do when I sit down at my Google home page!  The more I read them, the less dauting the task seems to feel.  Additionally, I have found that one of the things I love to do most is observe & analyze.  Not just boring stuff like numbers (boring to others, interesting to me!), but relationships, circumstances, conversations, Scripture, my children, others' perspectives, etc.  Now, it has gotten me into trouble before...more on that in some later post...I but I feel like I have learned so many things in my adult years.  Some big, but most are little but valuable.  When I start to draw conclusions about something or I see things in a new way, I can't wait to "reveal" it to David.  What I've learned.  What I feel God has shown me about something.  Anyway, I recently have been drawn to writing it down.  Not because I feel like I've mastered anything...but in reading other blogs I've realized how much it blesses me and helps me relate to someone I may not see very often.  I like to relate to people on a DEEP level.  Hence the title of my blog...with a bit of SNL reference!  But really, how much time can you really invest in people at that level.  So, for the trickle of friends/family who may stumble upon this blog, this is my one-way endeavor to show you a fuller Me.  Not just the Me that you see at Church, or in a class, or even at a family gathering...the Deeper Me.